A member of Parliament to Disraeli: Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.
That depends, Sir, said Disraeli, whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.
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He had delusions of adequacy.
- Walter Kerr
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He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
- Winston Churchill
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I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.
- Clarence Darrow --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.
- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
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Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it.
- Moses Hadas
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I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
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He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde
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I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one.
- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second .... if there is one.
- Winston Churchill, in response
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I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here.
- Stephen Bishop -----------------------------------------------------------------------
He is a self-made man and worships his creator.
- John Bright
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I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.
- Irvin S. Cobb
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He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.
- Samuel Johnson
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He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.
- Paul Keating
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In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.
- Charles, Count Talleyrand ---------------------------------------------------------------------
He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.
- Forrest Tucker
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Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?
- Mark Twain
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His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.
- Mae West
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Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
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He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination.
- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
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He has Van Gogh's ear for music.
- Billy Wilder
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I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I'm afraid this wasn't it.
- Groucho Marx
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