I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip
replacement, new knees,
fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear
anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to
blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have
poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all
my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.
Know how to prevent sagging?
Just eat till the
wrinkles fill out.
It's scary when you start making the same
noises as your
coffee maker.
These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says,
'For fast relief.'
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of
shape, so I got my
doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take
an aerobics class for seniors.
I bent, twisted,
gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But by the time I got
my leotards on, the class was over.
Just before the funeral services, the
undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, 'How old was your
husband?' '
98,' she replied . . . . 'Two years older than me'
'So you're 96,'
the undertaker commented.
She responded,
'Hardly worth going home, is it?
No comments:
Post a Comment